


a few thousand miles (and an ocean away)

by jacksmannequin



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Alternate Universe, Established Relationship, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Slice of Life, longing and arguing and obstacles to overcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:34:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27703523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jacksmannequin/pseuds/jacksmannequin
Summary: “I love you too, hyung.” Hyukjae closes his eyes for a second, his chin buried between his chest and his knees. If he focuses hard enough, he can almost feel the warmth of Jongwoon’s skin against his, and that has to be enough. “Tell me about your day.”or,Being apart hurts, but all you can do is try your best with what you have and hope it will be worth it.
Relationships: Kim Jongwoon | Yesung/Lee Hyukjae | Eunhyuk
Comments: 12
Kudos: 25





	a few thousand miles (and an ocean away)

“I wish I could be there so badly.”

“Of course you do,” Hyukjae says, dropping a stack of paper into his printer and looking at it with a deadly stare, his laptop left ignored in a corner of his desk. “You’re insatiable.”

“Well, I’m sorry my boyfriend lives on the other side of the planet, and I can only see him like once every three months if I’m lucky,” Jongwoon says, not even trying to hide the sarcasm. Hyukjae’s connection is a bit flimsy in the evenings, and he can tell the clock has already hit 9PM just by the way Jongwoon’s voice wavers on the last word. “Sometimes, it feels like I’m the only one who has an issue with that.”

“You know that’s not true, hyung,” Hyukjae says, then exhales so heavily that he has to stop what he’s doing for a second and look straight into the camera, the notes he was about to print out now forgotten. “Do you think I enjoy it? Not being able to see you properly instead of watching you through a screen for months on end?”

“Your behaviour makes it look that way,” Jongwoon says, clearly not intimidated by Hyukjae’s stare. It takes way more than that to scare Jongwoon off, but that wasn’t Hyukjae’s intention in the first place. “Sometimes.”

“Well, maybe that’s because I don’t wanna be a fucking downer all the time!” Hyukjae sighs yet again, more resigned this time. It’s not often that he wishes his roommate was home, but for once all he wants is for Henry to come barging through the door screaming about his professors and spare him the stress. “You know what? What makes you think I enjoy being all the way in fucking Canada while you’re in Seoul, when all I want is to be with my boyfriend like a normal person? It’s so frustrating that you of all people would say something like that. God.”

“Hyukjae…”

Hyukjae shakes his head, eyes shut, then covers his forehead with the palm of his hand and keeps quiet, trying to collect his thoughts. Jongwoon shuts up, at least, luckily—or else Hyukjae might have truly snapped.

“Hyung,” he begins, eventually, pulling out his chair from under the desk. He’s not going to get anything done tonight, so might as well sit down and get a good talk in. “Listen to me.”

Jongwoon nods on the screen, looking slightly less pixelated than before. At least his Wi-Fi is reading the room, if no one else is.

“How would you feel if I complained every day? If I kept reminding you of every second that goes by without us being in the same damn room?”

Jongwoon opens his mouth, a conflicted expression on his face, and all Hyukjae wants is to reach out. Reach out, and kiss that little frown off those delicate features he loves so much, but he can’t. And it hurts like hell, every single time.

“Not good?”

“I miss you every fucking day, hyung. Every single day, when I’m walking to class and I’m on the phone with you complaining about Henry forgetting to pay the damn water bill again. And all I want is to be able to tell you in person, just so I can hear your laugh in front of me without it sounding like it went through eight different cell towers before reaching my ears. If it were up to me, I’d be flying to Korea every weekend just to stay with you for not even a full day, but I can’t do that, because I’m a college student living off pizza and I certainly don’t have the money for something so idiotic.”

“Yeah,” Jongwoon says quietly, his gaze staring off into the distance.

Hyukjae knows Jongwoon’s bedroom—he’s seen it in person, and he’s been seeing it on camera every day for the past year and a half—and he knows exactly what Jongwoon’s eyes are focused on.

The two of them kissing under the mistletoe in Jongwoon’s family house on Christmas day. The only time Hyukjae’s ever been the one visiting Jongwoon and not the other way around, simply because his parents decided to visit the rest of the family for the holidays. He remembers the scene, has it engraved in his brain—has it staring back at him from his own desk, preserved in a pink picture frame Jongwoon claimed as made by his niece during one of her arts and crafts phases. Reminding him of what they could have if the circumstances were different.

“Do you think it would be fair of me at all? To complain constantly when you’re the one always visiting? The only one who has the money to do that, because you have a stable job and I haven’t even graduated yet?”

“Hyukjae-yah,” Jongwoon says eventually, his gaze meeting Hyukjae’s again through the camera, and Hyukjae finds himself looking away as a knee jerk reaction. “I would never hold that against you.”

Hyukjae nods. “You don’t know that.”

“I wouldn’t,” Jongwoon repeats, firmer, more concerned, and he sounds exactly like the Jongwoon he fell for again. “I knew what I was getting into just as well as you did. I quite literally signed up for it, and if I wasn’t so busy with work, I’d come visit at least once a month and get the money back by living solely off ramen.”

Hyukjae tries to bite back a smile, knowing all too well that Jongwoon would be capable of that and then some. He’s proven it multiple times, even if not to that extent, but he has—and Hyukjae knows he would do it again.

“Hyung—”

“I’m sorry,” Jongwoon says at the same time, then lets out a sharp breath, fidgeting with the wire of his earbuds. Hyukjae’s heart skips a beat at the sight. “I’m just—work was stressful today, and Kyuhyun is physically incapable of respecting deadlines, and I was a little on edge. You did not deserve that. I’m sorry, baby.”

Hyukjae gives a little nod. He only realizes he’s mirroring Jongwoon’s nervousness but by twisting his fingers when Jongwoon himself chuckles and shifts closer to the screen.

“I want to hold your hands so badly right now,” he says, then, his voice gone softer.

Hyukjae gets up and brings his laptop to bed, his throat tied in knots.

“That just gave me a flashback,” he admits, wrapping his arms around his legs and resting his chin on his knees.

Jongwoon smiles on the screen, most likely picturing the same scene. It’s not winter, they’re not in Seoul, and Jongwoon isn’t just a random man he met in a park in the late afternoon but, somehow, the rush is still the same.

“You have pretty hands.”

“Look who’s talking with his tiny baby hands.”

Jongwoon bursts out laughing, and his attempt at trying to hide it only makes Hyukjae smile more.

“It still doesn’t change the fact that your hands are pretty,” he says, then tilts his head slightly to the side, his eyes still sparkling in amusement. “I would do it again.”

“As if offering gloves to some random dude on the street once wasn’t weird enough.”

“You looked cold, and then you were smiling!” Jongwoon exclaims, a little pout in place, and Hyukjae’s heart melts a little. “I left an impression.”

“It was ridiculous, that’s what it was.” Hyukjae grins at the screen. Ridiculous or not—it’s his happiest memory. “I was smiling because it was absurd.”

“Okay? I still left an impression. I gave you my phone number, and you called me. Checkmate.”

“I was bored on vacation,” Hyukjae says, rolling his eyes. “Don’t think too highly of yourself.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I knew that. I wasn’t deaf to your accent, you know.”

“Okay, and?” Hyukjae sticks his tongue out, biting back yet another smile when Jongwoon does the same back at him. “You and my family are the only people I use Korean with out loud, give me a break.”

“I love you, Hyukjae.”

Hyukjae stops in his tracks, his heart jumping up to his throat. No matter how many times he hears it, it still has the same effect on him. Every single time. 

“I love you too, hyung.” Hyukjae closes his eyes for a second, his chin buried between his chest and his knees. If he focuses hard enough, he can almost feel the warmth of Jongwoon’s skin against his, and that has to be enough. “Tell me about your day.”

“I’m afraid this is gonna be all about Kyuhyun, because that idiot really doesn’t know what it means to work in a team? First of all, deadlines exist, and second of all—”

Hyukjae nods to himself, letting Jongwoon’s voice wash over him in the quiet of his room. It’s not enough, and they both know it will never be, but holding on until better times come is the only option they have. 

**Author's Note:**

> if you don't care to see my unrelated screaming, find me on my [writing focused account](http://twitter.com/parallelshyuk), otherwise i'm over at my [personal twt](http://twitter.com/homewithkyu) and on [curious cat](http://curiouscat.qa/parallelshyuk) ^^


End file.
